Romantic relationships are the most emotionally-charged parts of our lives. When there is a lot at stake, we realize at our core that these relationships contain the possibilities of our greatest happiness, and also our greatest losses. This is an area where negative emotions tend to fester and where our worst behaviors can manifest.
Highly-charged emotional responses are irrational, destructive, child-like, and manipulative. Each one of us has these self-sabotaging emotions, even if we are an otherwise stable, normal person. It’s important to realize that this part of us exists, and when out of control, can wreck havoc to a satisfying, healthy relationship. When you are “acting out” of a negative emotional-response pattern, there is a strong disconnection from your feelings of value and self-worth. You may even be reacting to a response from childhood or to past traumas.
It’s important to watch out for these patterns and not allow them to destroy your relationships. When strong negative feelings are present, it can be a challenge to see things objectively. We are at our most vulnerable in these moments, so it takes some effort to step back and not allow relationships to be driven solely by highly-charged emotional responses.
Remember, everyone has a dark side, so don’t deny this part of yourself. Each one of us has destructive emotional patterns and acknowledging this negativity can help to handle these difficult emotions with care. Remember, you and your partner are on the same team and are here to support each other.
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