Fall is a time of reflection for many; a time for looking inward and taking stock. For some however, it’s can also be a gloomy time of year, leading to depression. For some mothers in particular, once the hectic pace of the back-to-school season comes to an end, and life begins to settle down a bit, a sort of “mini-empty nest” syndrome may kick in. After a summer full of kids and high energy activities, the calm that follows the storm is not always welcome.
This is usually a temporary sensation of loss, quickly overcome when teacher conferences and extracurricular activities at school begin to fill your schedule. Yet, for a while at least, the feelings of loss and sadness can be very real. After all, having a house full of kids, though tiring, can be a real joy. Loosing that experience at the end of each summer can be a real drag.
The key to dealing with these feelings, this “mini-empty nest” syndrome, is to realize and accept that they are indeed temporary. Regular life will soon catch up with you and, before long, you are very likely to be complaining that you have no time for yourself – or your partner – again. In other words, things will soon return to “normal,” and you will again be the harried mom you always are when school’s in session.
In the meantime, to get through the mini-depression of losing your children to the new school year, focus on things that matter to you; things you don’t always have time for when the kids are the main focus of your life. If you work, refocus on your goals there. If you have a garden, take some time to clean up before winter hits. If you feel you may have neglected your partner a bit while the kids were out of school, spend some time focusing on the relationship, and devote some time and energy to just the two of you.
Remember, though school has just begun, sports and other activities will soon be demanding more from you, and the holidays really are just around the corner. Spend a little time on yourself to regenerate, then it’s time to “Be a Mom” again.
If you live in Toronto, and are having trouble coping with stress or the changing season, I am a stress management coach who can help you. Get in touch with me today.
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